Sunday 30 November 2014

The Destruction of Ovaries: Fact or Fiction?

When you come across an image of someone who you are sexually aroused to, a chain reaction begins to take over your body. Your pupils dilate, your breathing becomes laboured, rapturous heat fills your body and parts of you ache with longing.

In the realm of fangirls, there has been a common phenomenon that has run rampant with the most handsome of actors...it has a bevy of different titles, ranging from Cumberbatch Obsessive Love Disorder to Tomsilitis or "Post Tom-atic Stress Disorder". The one common symptom reported for such an obscure "disorder" is the destruction of ovaries.

Yep...you read that right...the destruction of ovaries.

In a world where science has an explanation for everything, women all over the world are now "suffering" from exploded ovaries from exposure to their favourite actor.

Cue facepalm and eye roll. Obviously that's not true. Looking at a handsome actor has no real effect on the ovaries at all except for the release of hormones.

Yet, look through all the fanpages on Facebook and Tumblr and all you will see are posts about how exposure to a favourite actor or character has caused the destruction of fangirls' ovaries everywhere. In fact, public service "announcements" have been created by ihatetomhiddleston.



This takes obsessing to a whole new level. As mentioned before, there's nothing wrong with finding an actor or celebrity handsome. I even ogle handsome actors from time to time. But saying that a man's level of handsomeness causes the destruction of ovaries is not only juvenile, but thoughtless...to the point where it is extremely insulting to other parties.

While fangirls think that joking about destroyed ovaries is harmless, it is insulting to two groups of people.

First of all, there are women out there who suffer from, and who have previously suffered from Ovarian Cancer. Do they think the destruction of ovaries is a joke? Absolutely not, and rightly so. They go through pain and suffering just to survive the terrible disease, more than enough for a lifetime. What gives fangirls the right to joke about something so sensitive? The same goes for their loved ones, who witness their fight for survival every day. Do the fangirls know what it's really like to see someone they care about live in constant, gut wrenching pain every day?

Secondly, the Post Tom-Atic Stress disorder is a terrible attempt at a joke as well. There are soldiers, police officers, firefighters, and even paramaedics who suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Those who are afflicted with it deal with constant reminders of the traumatic situation they faced previously and it is painful to them...not only physically but also psychologically. It's not something a victim faces alone either. Families are also affected by Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It's an everyday struggle for all who are affected, whether directly or indirectly.

I think fangirls should think twice before making such things in jest because they obviously don't know who they are insulting or hurting.

Saturday 29 November 2014

The Adventures of Artemis: First taste of the fandoms.

DISCLAIMER: No names will be revealed to protect the innocent...and for now, the not-so-innocent.

For years, I had been a closeted fan of comic books, Sherlock and Doctor Who for fear of ridicule from my peers. Nobody in my circles shared my enthusiasm for such things, so I was mostly solitary in my interests.

It wasn't until I began spending more time on Facebook that I began to see the emergence of fan pages on my news feed based on my interests. Initially, I was wary, because I am mostly a lone wolf when it comes to socialization. However, when I spied some of the comments made on posts, I decided to start liking a few pages about Loki and Tom Hiddleston.

It started innocently enough, but when new pages popped up, I noticed the decline in respect. A lot of the comments I read and a lot of the pages that started began to sound sexually sinister. There was one certain page where the owner consistently mentioned what Tom did to her lady parts and I was absolutely disgusted. I immediately avoided going onto that page.

Now, I have always been one who would avoid doing anything to call attention to a celebrity if I saw them in public. I always felt that the only way to be a fan was to be respectful and keep any insidious comments to myself. I live in an NHL city and have seen my fair share of NHL players everywhere I went, including in places that I have worked. My city is a huge fishbowl and is full of obsessed puck bunnies who want to bag a player. (A Puck Bunny is someone who claims to be a fan of a certain NHL team or player not because she likes hockey, but that she wants to date the players.) I have met a few NHL players in my time and I have always been thanked for not calling attention to them and also for showing respect.

So, when I see actors and actresses being objectified because of a certain character they portray, I start to become annoyed and disgusted.

Cut to December 2013...I discovered a fan page that was about Tom Hiddleston.

When I initially followed the page, I made a few comments here or there and was generally well received. I had excellent rapport with the admins, especially one who was as eloquent and polite as Tom himself.

After a few weeks of interaction, it became known that there would be an admin contest for the page. In the earlier months, I had tried to become admin for a couple of pages...one never even got back to me and the other suddenly dropped me after one day of posting (without warning or feedback). Initially I shied away from trying because of those experiences, but eventually decided to go for broke and throw my hat into the ring.

Within a few days of the announcement, I put in my application and kept my fingers crossed. The contest was to close on January 20th, so I had more than a month of waiting until the decisions were made. I can honestly say that it was a difficult wait, even though it was just over a month.

Every day, I had my phone glued to my side, checking it obsessively for messages or clues about the upcoming decision. I drove coworkers, friends and family insane with my nervous behaviour. Although I had a good feeling that I would be chosen, I was still worrying about the outcome. What would I do if I wasn't chosen?

I eventually got to the point where I prepared myself for disappointment. I had no experience as an admin and I wasn't one who interacted obsessively with the page. Whenever I would interact with the admin, we would build a good rapport until two other fangirls would try and steal his attention away from me.

It was starting to get on my nerves because I had a wonderful connection with this admin and one of the two fangirls was desperate for his attention. I am not a person who likes to be interrupted, especially when I am locked into an interesting conversation on any medium of communication. This fangirl could have started her own thread with him but kept muscling in on mine...I had enough! So, the next time I commented on one of the admins posts and he started interacting with me, I resorted to interrupting the fangirl whenever she tried to interrupt the admin and I.

Cut to early January, on a Saturday evening. I was sitting on my couch, curled up with my phone, when I received the message that would change my life. By that point, I had resigned myself to accepting whatever fate I was given and I was prepared for disappointment and was ready to move on. But, when I read the message, I dropped my phone in shock.

When I retrieved my phone and re-read the message, I began to forget about the preparing I had done for any eventual disappointment and began planning my posting strategy for the days to come. I had been chosen to be an admin for the page...and I was chosen by my admin friend himself.

I chose my admin name to be Artemis and I vowed that I would do everything I could to be respectful to Tom Hiddleston and to have my posts reflect my vow.

And thus, my journey as Artemis began...

Friday 28 November 2014

Obsession...You're My Obsession...

When you think of obsession today, you are vaguely reminded of the song by Animotion from the 1980s.

"I will have you...yes I will have you. I will find a way and I will have you."

While the lyrics are somewhat a playful take on lust, it is a frightening reality in the world of fandoms. Granted, everyone has fantasized about an actor or a singer or a celebrity. It's human nature. However, when your fantasies spill into your everyday life, there is cause for concern.

The biggest thing that fuels fangirl/fanboy behaviour is obsession. No longer is their actor a human being...they have become an object of twisted desire. A lot of celebrities go out in public incognito so that they won't be harassed by obsessed fans.

I am not talking about your garden variety admirer who sends gifts and creepy letters. I am talking about individuals who find out where a celebrity is staying or living if it's in their vicinity...hanging out at an actor's favourite restaurant to interrupt their dinner for an autograph. Individuals who run after the car a celebrity is leaving Comic-Con in because they wanted to meet them.

If you look at the images of Benedict Cumberbatch with fans, you can clearly tell when he is annoyed at being harassed at public functions. What you thought was the friendly point isn't what it seems. When he is annoyed with a fan, he will point at them with a tired look upon his face. When he isn't annoyed, he is smiling genuinely and looking like he is enjoying himself. Sadly, a lot of fangirls and fanboys cannot tell the difference even though it is plainly obvious. If you were wondering, he was the one whose car was chased down by an obsessed fan at Comic-Con.

<----- Exhibit A: Tired and annoyed at being hounded.  He and Louise Brealey were at lunch and a performance when they were approached by two fangirls. (P.S. It killed me to post this image as I don't like scouring the internet for impromptu pictures of him trying to live as a normal human being.)

Tom Hiddleston is a fan favourite because he always takes the time for his fans, even when he is
tired, sick or possibly even annoyed. But even he has his limits...and rightfully so. His phone has been hacked, his private online accounts have been hacked...his hotel room in Toronto and shooting locations for Crimson Peak were leaked all over the internet. Yet, being the admirable soul that he is, he still tries to put a smile on his fans' faces...even if he is frightened beyond belief or sick as a dog.

This kind of behaviour takes its toll on celebrities. They aren't dancing monkeys who perform for our twisted enjoyment, they are professionals who create and display art in dramatic form.

Put yourself in their shoes. Would you like to be harassed and followed by obsessed people everywhere you go? Would you like to be afraid that you won't be able to pursue a normal relationship with your soulmate because they will get death threats? Would you enjoy being approached in an airport and hounded when you're trying to catch your flight home? I know I wouldn't...so I choose to let them be.

Perhaps fangirls and fanboys should follow my example and do the same!!!

Thursday 27 November 2014

Spoiler Alert: Latest Series and Seasons Ruined

We have all been there. A new and interesting show has been discovered and you want to find out more about the characters and the storyline...or, the latest season of your favourite program has finally aired or you are eagerly anticipating it to air.

So, you log into Tumblr and are besieged by posts and gifs and images of your favourite programs, books and characters. Your eyes widen in disbelief and fury when you see that people who have already seen the latest episodes or seasons have ruined what you were eagerly waiting for with spoilers, shipping and theories. The latest episodes haven't been released in your area yet and now you already know what has happened and what will happen. Now, your favourite series is ruined and you are disappointed.

Because of rampant rumors and posts of plot theories and explanations and "feels" brought on by what you were once excited to see, several new shows, and several current shows with new seasons have been spoiled.

We here in North America aren't lucky enough to see BBC One shows like Sherlock and Doctor Who until months after those in Europe have seen it. Those of us who are busy parents and have careers and lives rely on our PVRs to tape missed episodes. Others rely on downloads and iTunes to get the latest episodes and films because they can't afford the exorbitant prices of theatre tickets or simply do not have the time to rush to see the latest films.

So what gives fangirls and fanboys the right to ruin our favourite shows because they got to see it first? Canadians don't jump on Tumblr and discuss the final season of Republic of Doyle before the other continents air it. So why should the rest of the world ruin Sherlock, Doctor Who and other series?

I have a massive bone of contention in regards to the Sherlock series, not just because of the spoilers, but also with the "shipping".

"Shipping", according to the Tumblr savvy crowd is the act of pairing two characters together in a romantic partnership. You will see name mashups like "FrostIron" (Loki and Iron Man), "JohnLock" (John Watson and Sherlock Holmes), "CapWidow" (Captain America and Black Widow) all in the spirit of fandoms.

While some of the pairings are passable, others are quite bizarre. As someone who has enjoyed the  plays, programs and novels about Sherlock Holmes since early childhood, I do take offence to the "Johnlock" pairing because neither Sherlock nor Watson were homosexual. Now, don't start thinking that I am homophobic as I am passionate about equal rights for the LGBT community and have signed several petitions and have given my support to them so they could enjoy the same freedom as the straight community.

I am quite sure that a large number of those who ship Watson and Holmes have never read any of the books or seen the classic series with Basil Rathbone or Jeremy Brett, which is the really offensive part because I grew up with all of that and was a fan before many of these fangirls/fanboys were even born. I don't appreciate my childhood solaces and interests ruined by someone who hasn't given those same mediums their full attention.

Don't mistake shipping with modern fanfiction because a lot of fanfiction before the rise of Tumblr was created by people who were longtime fans of their subjects and those slash stories were pretty much taboo.

Discussing "feels", also known as feelings brought on by a particular series, film or book is alright in moderation. Before the rise of the internet, people have gathered around water coolers to discuss a recent episode of a prime time television show. But fangirls and fanboys should have the courtesy of keeping their feels out of Tumblr until the series and movies have been released worldwide...or at least put the two most courteous words in the world to the rest of us fans...SPOILER ALERT...in the title or even in the blog description.

Plot theories are generally harmless, but, if it involves something that hasn't been released to everyone, fangirls and fanboys should keep it to themselves.

Generally, fangirls and fanboys should keep a lot of things to themselves, especially where new shows, episodes, films or books haven't been released yet.

Wednesday 26 November 2014

Fan Shaming: Driven by Envy or Jealousy?

Fan shaming is the latest phenomenon running rampant in all the fandoms. I touched on it briefly in my last post, but now we will focus on it more fully.

As mentioned before, not everyone in the fandom is guilty of this disrespectful behaviour, but it has happened so much and so severely that it needs to be exposed. 

You're probably tired of hearing about Coriolanus and it's impact on the Hiddlestoners and Tom himself, but it's the most severe example of where fan shaming clouded what was supposed to be a wonderful performance for Tom and a wonderful experience for fans and patrons.

Cut to Tumblr, the mecca for all fandoms, and you will find post after post condemning fans for their behaviour at Coriolanus, whether in the audience or at the stage door. 

One blog post, titled "Utterly Appalled", written by ravenguest, starts off with "I can't even talk about the play as I am so disgusted by the way in which people were treating the wonderful MR.H. This man is grace incarnate, polite, sweet, friendly and generous with his time. How do fans repay him? They treat him like a piece of meat." (ravenguest, 2013)

I wouldn't refer to this post as fan shaming because her observations are fairly accurate and informed. I honestly don't blame her for everything written in her post because it refers to the other appalling behaviours that most fangirls and fanboys exhibit in public, especially when they have the chance to see their idol up close.

Another untitled blog post, written by hiddlestonandtom, is a shining example of fan shaming:

"But it does seem that a number of “fans” have only been interested in going to Coriolanus to get to meet Tom. There are those that have gone multiple times - while I don’t care what you spend your money on - it’s incredibly selfish seeing how hard it is to get tickets. It’s also incredibly selfish to then do the stage door multiple times - while you’re chuffed that you’ve “met” Tom multiple times, your selfishness has meant that someone else (equally deserving) has missed out. Shame." (hiddlestonandtom, 2013)

I agree that the vast majority of fangirls were interested in seeing Coriolanus because of Tom...whether it was the chance to meet him or the chance to see him up close. But the fact that there is a complaint about those who were able to get multiple tickets is irrelevant. In August, I was able to purchase two second row tickets to the sold-out performance of "Hamlet" starring Benedict Cumberbatch. Does that mean that I am a selfish woman for planning my purchase down to a T?

Granted, she also mentions that some of those who got tickets to multiple performances gravitated towards the stage door multiple times, and I do agree that it's selfish because everyone deserves a chance to meet Tom if it's in the cards. If someone has met Tom multiple times, they should step back and let the man meet his other fans. It's only fair.

When I attend the performance of "Hamlet", I'm not even going to bother going to the stage door because I already know it will be a crowded, unorganized mess. I am also pretty sure that the vast majority of people at the stage door will be the fangirls and I refuse to be defined by their behaviour. I am also lucky enough to have Benedict's autograph, so I don't see any point in mobbing him for it. Now, if I somehow get to meet him in between the end of the performance and his departure, then I will let him know what I thought of the performance. He and his fellow thespians are wary of hearing things other than "You are tremendously talented" or "I appreciate your hard work in your performance" and deserve the respect they've earned throughout their careers.

Getting back on topic, the fan shaming of the second article is too generalized. I am sure that not all fans who purchased tickets to multiple performances were huddled at the stage door, salivating for a chance to meet Tom again. Perhaps they got those tickets because they loved the performance so much...or maybe they didn't have a good experience the first time because of rabid fangirl behaviour and disrespect. You can't just shame a whole group of people based on a select few. Plus, she doesn't sound like someone who was actually there, she's basing everything off of Mr Hiddleston's tweets regarding the situations at the stage door and box office and another blogger's post. If I didn't know any better, she was jealous that she wasn't able to get tickets.

A lot of fans were unable to get tickets. Not all of them resorted to fan shaming to make themselves feel better about the situation. I am from Canada...it is super hard to get tickets to overseas performances unless you are on the ball. I was never able to get tickets to Coriolanus, but I was able to see it via satellite through the National Theater Live series at my local theatre. I am happy for those respectful fans who were able to get tickets because live theater is a wonderful experience.

If you read further into the article, she also basically accuses Mr. Hiddleston himself of fan shaming. In my experiences of being a bullying victim, it's the bully who exhibits the behaviour and then accuses someone else of it.

It's the generalizations and uninformed comments that have given fan shaming the power that it has today. Not only is it ignorant, but it is disrespectful as well. It is not unlike the behaviour of a bully. There are fans who have been lucky enough to have met Tom who were shamed because they were at the stage door after the performance. Not every single fan who lined up was rude and disrespectful to the staff...there were people who waited there patiently for their turn.

There's no crime in trying to meet your idol...the real crime is lashing out against those who were successful because jealousy runs rampant among fangirls. If you are one of the fortunate ones, you will be shamed for "hounding" your favourite actor to meet him and accused of being a fangirl when you just wanted to let them know how much you enjoyed and appreciated their work. Yes, I know you respectful fans exist out there...I am one of them.

Fan shaming is one of the biggest reasons why I abandoned the fandom in the first place. I believe in being a fan on my own terms and I will only condemn fangirl behaviours if they are disrespectful and/or harm others, including the celebrities involved. If I go and meet one of my favourite actors, it is because I wanted to let them know how much I enjoyed their work. An autograph is a bonus, but I will never press for it. I believe in giving them the respect they and their work deserve.

You will have to be prepared for when "Hamlet" starts in August because I am highly certain that the fan shaming will be even worse during those three months of the performance. Those of us who took advantage of the two presales will have targets on our backs because the performance officially sold out on the first day of the public sale. (The online queue was made up of at least 30,000 hopeful people attempting to get tickets) Please be prepared for the backlash because there are a lot of disappointed and angry fangirls out there who are chomping at the bit to start shaming those who are there, whether they are disrespectful or not.

 I refuse to be a part of it. Those who are disrespectful will already make themselves look foolish in front of everyone, including Benedict himself and there's no need to further exacerbate it.

If you are part of the elite group I am in, as in the group that was able to get tickets, I implore you to treat Benedict with respect and save the ogling and disrespectful behaviour for the privacy of your own home. He already has had issues with a few fans and is wary of being treated like an object. He is a human being...human beings get tired...they get annoyed...and they get hurt. And, I will be damned if anyone does anything to hurt Benedict because he is a wonderful, kind individual who deserves all the love and respect he's earned.

I do not own the excerpts from the blog posts I mentioned in this post.

Tuesday 25 November 2014

Anatomy of a Fangirl (or Fanboy)

Disclaimer: The following description is only about those who give fans a bad name. I am well aware that there are a lot of those in the fandom that do not fit this description so please don't take offence or think that I am grouping everyone into this category. As mentioned before, a lot of fans are respectful individuals and will never be like what I am about to describe from what I have seen.

They swarm theatres...they swarm the malls...all you hear is how much they love a certain actor or series. You go onto Tumblr, one of their hotspots, and you see post after post of their reactions to a certain episode...in fact, they spoil episode plots to all the popular shows...it is a common, but sorry sight.

Who are such people?

They are the fangirls and fanboys.

Unlike the more respectful fans in the fandoms, they seem more heavily obsessed. All they can talk about is their favourite book, film, show or thespian to the point that they don't know about anything else in the world.

In public places, like a movie theatre, they are frequently heard in line and in the theatres themselves, obsessing over their twisted fantasies and objectifying those they fantasize about. I've seen this first hand.

They go onto Facebook fan pages and share all posts and images they can find to their profiles, ignoring warnings about copyrighted content, such as written work. Their profiles only consist of their obsessions...there's nothing about them personally, not even a rare post about what's going on in their lives.

While on fan pages for actors, they frequently describe how much that particular person makes them swoon and often mention highly sexual things involving the two of them...no matter how far-fetched it sounds.

There are also fan pages started by such individuals which promote disrespect of the actor or actress through treating them only like an object to be controlled and taken. In the fandoms I was a part of, I frequently cringed when I saw how such people talked about Tom Hiddleston and Benedict Cumberbatch...if either man saw these posts, he would be afraid...very, very afraid. It also explains why some actors avoid social media altogether.

Such pages also scour the internet for the latest news and gossip about the celebrities they obsess over. Facebook and Tumblr become plastered with personal announcements and dating rumors. Pictures of Martin Freeman's children were circulated around both sites against his and Amanda Abbington's wishes because Benedict Cumberbatch was in the images as well.

Personal privacy is not something that is considered for the actors. It is a truly frightening thing when you see it firsthand. In the two pages I manage on Facebook, I constantly preach about respect...and I speak out against treating actors like objects. They are human beings, plain and simple!

Fan shaming is probably the worst behaviour exhibited by fangirls and fanboys. During the stretch of Coriolanus last year, Tumblr and Facebook were both filled to the brim with posts of people being shamed for their behaviour at the performances. And, most of the time, those who were being shamed were the ones exposing the bad behaviour of others at the theatre and at the stage door. Even fans who were clever enough to be able to go to more than one performance were shamed because others couldn't go and see it.

This is the behaviour of a bully, plain and simple. Fandoms are joined with the lure of acceptance, but  the fangirls and fanboys quickly show you what a nightmare it really is. People are afraid to post about meeting their favourite actor/actress or getting tickets to the sold out performance of Hamlet because they will be targeted or ridiculed out of sheer jealousy.

You can't easily pick out a fangirl or fanboy on appearance alone. A lot of the cosplayers are respectable fans that like to dress up as their favourite characters. But, that area of the fandom is also riddled with bullying and fan shaming as well. In a world that now preaches tolerance, fans are afraid to be fans on their own terms. It is sad and utterly ridiculous.

Fans should be fans on their own terms...but not if it hurts other fans in the process. Fangirls and fanboys need to respect that golden rule.

Monday 24 November 2014

The Fandoms Need You!!

Do you like books? Do you like film? Are you a fan of the Avengers? Then there is a fandom for you!

This is basically how you are recruited into the realm of the Fandom. There are fandoms for every book, every film, every graphic novel and even every actor.

Too complex for you? Then here’s a small illustration.

Sally is a fan of the Hobbit, Harry Potter and Tom Hiddleston. There are three fandoms that appeal to her: the Hobbit fandom, the Potterdom, and the fandom known as Hiddlestoners. The “beauty” of fandoms is that you don’t have to choose to be part of one…you can be a part of as many as you like.
That’s how you get sucked in, unfortunately.

Plus, when you become a part of the fandom, you aren’t just you anymore. You are a fangirl/fanboy. A lot of fangirls and fanboys have already developed a very bad reputation. Do you remember when Coriolanus was featured at the Donmar Warehouse last year?

The Hiddlestoner fandom earned a terrible reputation because of the disrespect a select few showed the other patrons and the disrespect they showed to the performers themselves, including Mr. Hiddleston himself. The worst part is that quite a large number of fandom members were completely respectful and innocent. A few bad apples spoiled the entire barrel. They were just rounded together because they were all Hiddlestoners.

I will clarify one caveat about the fangirls/fanboys. Not all of them are crazy, obsessed individuals who live in a dream world. Some of them are professionals…some of them are respectable members of the community…some of them are mothers and fathers…a lot of them are kind, respectable people.

Once you are a part of the fandom, they don’t prepare you for what lies ahead.

However, that’s another story that I will regale you with another time.


Dear reader, please don’t assume that I am attacking every individual in a fandom. I’m just exposing the fandom itself and every negative thing it signifies. For everyone still in the fandom, please be careful and never forget that you are a unique, special individual who means a lot to the world. You don’t need to be defined by what you enjoy…just be yourself!

Introduction

Hello readers!

We live in an age where being nerdy and different is celebrated. There are so many groups we align ourselves to in our innate desire to be accepted among our kind. Being a member of such a group sounds like a utopian paradise for the lonely and the misunderstood who love comic books, films, television series, book series and video games.  As Loki once quipped, "Freedom is life's greatest lie".

Like everything else, these particular interest groups called Fandoms have a dark side that nobody sees until it is too late.

Who am I? I am an avid cypherpunk and former fandom enthusiast. This Blog will chronicle all the insidious behaviours and obsessions that a fandom breeds and abides by.

I am not writing this because I think I am above all those in Fandoms, I just want to expose everything about this farce and bed of lies.

The truth needs to come out.